The other day, someone commented to me that they respected the faithfulness I had to my husband in this season of estrangement and conflict. And I thought with a chuckle, "That's what you think I'm being faithful to?" It's actually much simpler than that - I simply being faithful and respectful to MY own values, he has far less to do with my choices. It has to do with how I see myself as a person more than what I expect from my husband in the future.
It must be a hard concept for some - the idea that until you are faithful to yourself you can be faithful to no one else. That also implies that you have the maturity to know what you value and have enough self-control to practice the standard of conduct that is consistent with your values.
I respect my values and the beliefs that they are founded upon. Therefore, acting in accordance with them, although some times challenging, is the goal. It is about living an authentic and truthful life. If you have values that you are not comfortable espousing or living something is out of whack - your beliefs or behavior. The work of life involves bringing those things into harmonious alignment.
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